Ill again...

I'm quite ill... can't almost think straight now. haha.

Did another event yesterday. Pretty fruitful, I must say -- witnessed the first solemnization as far as I'm concerned. It is pretty touching. Tho I didn't cry. Wasn't touching enuff to cry. And it does include quite a lot of things to do after marriage. haha.

A few interesting things about the wedding. A young Indonesian bride married to a dashing young man. Makes me think of one of my staff. Wat is life? Both married Singaporeans, but with very different consequences, I believe.

It doesn't seem like an equal marriage, hmmm... perhaps that's what certain men want. Simple as that. And some women are looking for that kind of a security. I guess I am too... haha. Just like why M gave up on her bf, cos he's simply too "nuah" for her. :P Yeah, he must be someone smarter, more powerful, and have bigger dreams than I do! I'd be glad. Who doesn't want a perfect man? Hmmm, who doesn't strive to be one, anyway? Haha. So they shld be all around the place, isn't it? Is tt warped logic or wat. ha!

This appeared in TODAY today:
MOULDER OF ROMANTIC DREAMS

Long before a teenage girl finds her first real boyfriend or ever falls in love, her attitude towards men is quietly being shaped by her father. I'm one of the many psychologists who believe that the dad and daughter relationship sets the stage for all future romantic involvements. If a young woman's father is an alcoholic and a bum, she'll spend her life trying to find a man who can meet the needs he never recognised in her heart. If he's warm and nurturing, she'll look for a love to equal him. If he thinks she's beautiful and feiminine, she'll be inclined to see herself that way. But, if he rejects her as unattractive and uninteresting, she's likely to carry self-esteem problems into her adult years. (How true!)
I've also observed that a woman's relationship with her future husband is significantly influenced by the way she preceived her father's authority. If whe was overbearing and capricious during her earlier years, she may be inclined to precipitate power struggles with her husband throughout married life (How terrible!).
But if the dad blended love and discipline in a way that conveyed strength, she may be more confortable with a give and take marriage where the reins of leadership are not contested. So much of what goes into marriage starts with a girl's father. That's why it behooves us as dads to give out best effort to the raising of those kids around our feet.

********************If any dads and dads-to-be are reading this, PPPLLLEEAASSE make sure you are well-equipped, or you might scar a child for life.********************

Maybe that's why I haven't found someone. Cos I'd be looking for someone like my Dad?(GOD FORBID!!!) Or it's simply cos there are not many like my Dad around (Hallelujah!) Either way, I lose. :P Or maybe all the ones I've found have a common streak -- abandonment. They see something they don't quite like, they run. A relationship takes a few things to grow and mature. Love creates the initial spark. Commitment and respect make it last. When some of these are missing, the brew simply refuses to cook. It's worse than flogging a dead horse. Love is Magic. Jesus is Life.

Was at a client's place today and she requested us to help her throw away her old cotton bathroom sandals. I remarked that it's still new, maybe could take it home. ( I wasn't serious...) My staff (all of them older than I am) was aghast at that thot... "I'm sure you don't want to take someone else's leftovers," That set me thinking -- yeah, why should I settle to be second best? It simply doesn't make sense. I'd be doing myself a disservice. Very much so.

Another interesting article from TODAY's Focus on the Family on Dec 9:
THE CLASS OF '65

In the mid-1960s, Time magazine selected the senior class of Palisades High School in Southern California as a fodus for its cover story entitled, "Today's Teenager".

These young men and women lived in one of the wealthiest school districts in America and their parents inclusded many of the nation's rich and famous. Time said they "stood on the fringe of a golden era as they left high school and headed for college."

10 years later, two members of that classs, Michael Medved and David Wallechinsky wrote a book entitled WHAT REALLY HAPPENED TO THE CLASS OF '65? Their follow-up study was striking. Their former classmates, far from entering a golden era, had been plagued by personal tragedy and emotional unrest. Drug abuse, rebellion, sexual irresponsibility, divorce, and even prison time were common for that group. Many were still lost and unprepared for the game of life. According to Medved and Wallechinsky, the immaturity and rebellion of their fellow students was a product of parental indulgence. Their moms and dads had consistently given them money, bailed them out of jail, repaired their wrecked cars, and made it possible to avoid work or study. Perhaps more importantly, their parents had failed to teach them values and ethics and beliefs on which the meaning of life is based. Well, that occurred many years ago, but I wonder, is there relevance for us today?